What’s the most unfair advantage a person can have? It’s not what you might think.
There is no such thing as an unfair advantage.
It’s an illusion created by the people that always make up excuses to not face their insecurities.
But there is a thing that can be considered an unfair mindset.
And that is being resilient.
- It’s the quality of being crazy focused or just plain crazy. Getting shot down and getting uncomfortable over and over again until you thrive on insecurity and challenges.
- It means to stop waiting for permission and start getting your foot in the door until people catch up with how great you actually are.
- It’s the ability to be proactive, instead of reactive. To make your own choices and stand up to your values instead of being tossed around by circumstances.
- It’s about accepting who you are, becoming vulnerable and accomplishing things that truly matter instead of seeking validation
When you break a pre-established pattern of what is considered normal and achievable for your current status, you will face adversity, you will face the most bitter hardships. But resilient people switch fear with play, they get excited for what it could be instead of fearing what it might not be.
Then it’s a matter of the rest of the world just catching up.
was a famous baseball pitcher. Nothing extraordinary until you find out he had only one hand.
was a kid born in South Africa. Today he is a huge business magnate and futurist. Not bad for someone who moved to Canada without a very well thought out plan and tended vegetables and shoveled out grain bins at a cousin’s farm. He could’ve stopped when he became a millionaire and sold PayPal for 180 million. Instead, he invested the money in 3 more companies and had to borrow money for rent.
is the billionaire founder of shapewear company Spanx. After selling fax machine for 7 years and working on her project nights and weekends, she was still refused constantly but in the end, her idea took off. She confessed that one of her greatest weaknesses is also her greatest strength: being underestimated.
was a single mother living on welfare. She was forced to rely on state benefits and spent much of her time writing “Harry Potter” in cafés. 12 publishing houses rejected her work. Until she finally got a “YES”. The rest is history.
But let’s not just look at the famous few that are at the peak of the mountain. Success here means, being in touch with your authentic self. It means to stop searching, instead, start pursuing and being excited about the future. When life becomes a process of continuous cultivation you’re not waiting anymore for change, you are leading it.
My grandfather never finished 8th grade. He didn’t like formal education and could not afford it due to his family’s condition. Instead, he was curious and enjoyed electronics. He became self-taught and during his adulthood managed to create a great income for himself by doing what he loved and helping other people out.
Resilience is born when potential meets determination.
One of my favorite movies is Rocky. Because it portrays a broken down, less intelligent guy who couldn’t speak or even fight properly. But he had heart. And with that, he managed to leave a mark despite adversity and circumstances that didn’t favor him. In the third movie, Rocky Balboa loses the title match and starts doubting himself. He gets scared and lets the negative outlook get to his head. His former opponent Apollo Creed takes him to an old training gym where a lot of rookies were training vigorously. They had a certain look in their eyes.
Apollo turned to Rocky and said:
Now, when we fought, you had that eye of the tiger, man; the edge! And now you gotta get it back, and the way to get it back is to go back to the beginning. You know what I mean?
Some people only think in a straight line. That you need to go forward. But sometimes you need to take a few steps back, learn, readjust and try a different approach.
Some people avoid pain because they’re afraid of weakness. They try to maintain a fragile bubble that can burst at any moment. But getting in touch with your weakness is a strong point. It can help you become more self-aware and it opens you up to growth instead of a limiting mindset.
Resilience can be taught. It can be exercised like a muscle. You cannot control external events but you can control how you react to them.
So in the end, it’s not an unfair mindset either.
Stop envying and start taking action and begin falling flat on your face. You will be happier and more fulfilled than forever questioning “what ifs”.
Jamie Foxx say once something that really struck a chord inside me:
What’s on the other side of fear?